U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
