This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
