I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
