I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
