i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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