I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize