Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize