Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Just cropdusted the office
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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