the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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