I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize