You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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