Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize