called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Randomize