The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
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