Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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