is your mom at the bar?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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