hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
