Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
