I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Randomize
