with your own penis?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
