PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
3pm strippers are depressing
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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