He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
