Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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