Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
