I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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