I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
