she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
