Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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