In the future we'll all be gay
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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