her facebook's as public as her vagina
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
