They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize