You can't motorboat a personality
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize