That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
