Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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