it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
