Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
