have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
