i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize
