Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
