I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
