Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
