I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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