I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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