...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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