the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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