Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
