I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Duck Duck Cougar?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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