loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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