You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
