WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Randomize
