I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
